A mother writes to advice columnist Annie Lane about her strained relationships with her three sons, two of whom are drug addicts and alcoholics, and one who is a narcissist. After a difficult divorce from their emotionally abusive father, she has spent the past 20 years trying to repair the relationship with her sons, but to no avail. Her therapist suggests that she let go and stop contacting them since they never respond.
The columnist advises the mother to work on her own healing and forgiveness towards herself, her ex-husband, and her sons. She acknowledges that the sons may be hurting and that their actions are a reflection of their own pain. By finding peace within herself, there is a greater likelihood that her sons may come back to her when they are ready.
The advice given is to focus on personal growth and finding joy in life, rather than trying to force a relationship with her sons. The mother is encouraged to let go of expectations and allow her sons to come back to her in their own time, if they choose to do so.
Annie Lane’s advice column offers insights into navigating difficult family dynamics and finding peace in challenging situations. Her second anthology, “How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is available for readers seeking more guidance on relationships, communication, and reconciliation.
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